Talk Smart at the Holiday Office Party
Stay clear of conversation blunders that can derail your career.
By Don Gabor
As a Toastmaster, you know that all speaking is public speaking – whether you are giving a Table Topics presentation at your club or conversing with colleagues and clients at the holiday office party. Of course, if an “ah” or “um” slips into one of your speeches, probably no one (except perhaps another Toastmaster) will ever know.
However, make one of the following conversation gaffes at the holiday office party and your career and professional image could be headed for trouble. Here are some of the most common career-crunching mistakes:
1. Making inappropriate comments – even in jest
Nothing can ruin a budding or even established career faster than, “letting your hair down,” in a way that keeps your colleagues whispering, “Can you believe what he said?” Using sexual innuendo or telling off-color jokes at the holiday work party is a sure-fire way to attract attention, but not the kind that will boost your career. This blunder can quickly send your prospects for advancement into a downward spiral. Never forget that the office party is a business – not social – situation, where most of the rules of business etiquette apply.
2. Talking only with your officemates
Chatting for a few minutes at seasonal office gatherings with your work buddies is all part of the fun, but if you stay ensconced in your closed circle of friends for too long, new co-workers, prospects or others will quickly cast you and your colleagues as cliquish, disinterested and not open to outsiders. Staying in one place too long, whether you are talking to someone or nibbling on the appetizers, will also give the impression that you’re shy, self-conscious or lacking confidence. Instead, chat with your buddies for a few minutes and then move to different areas of the room to introduce yourself to others you want to get to know better.
3. Talking too much or too little about yourself
“So, enough about my job! Let me show you a picture of my kids (cats, car, etc.)!” Sure, people love to talk about themselves, their pets, kids and grandchildren, but if you are the one doing all the talking at the office party, you could quickly become a bore to the other guests. On the other hand, if you are too tight-lipped, then people may see you as secretive, defensive or lacking interest and enthusiasm. The remedy is to exchange information about various light subjects at about the same rate so that you both know what the other enjoys and likes to talk about. Offer some information and then allow the other person enough time to fully respond with information of their own.
4. Complaining or gossiping about colleagues or clients
You might be tempted and it may even be well-deserved, but never get involved in a gripe session about a colleague or client while attending a holiday office party. As obvious as this blunder is, people seem to do it all the time, especially after a few drinks. Even if you’re not the one making the crass remarks, if word gets back to the “offending person” you will still pay the price long after the party is over. If possible, politely excuse yourself from the conversation as quickly as you can. However, if you find yourself stuck with this group, then take the initiative and bring up something that moves the discussion to a more positive topic.
Holiday Office Parties Offer Golden Opportunities to Hone Your Communication Skills
The holiday office party is a great place to make small talk, establish rapport and build better relationships with your colleagues, acquaintances and clients. As long as you focus on upbeat subjects that lead to sharing common professional and personal interests, goals and experiences, you’ll have plenty to talk about while boosting your career and honing your communication skills!
Condensed from “Talk Smart at the Holiday Office Party” by Don Gabor in the December 2009 Toastmaster magazine.